Strangeness and Peace 

Driving through the national park while the little one sleeps in the backseat.  We are not only camping tonight; we are camping with the cat for the second time this summer.

The cat is not pleased.

Snow drapes the mountainsides already, like making the mount and look like big women wearing heavy shawls.

Are they trying to tell us something about the coming winter?

I always feel happy driving into the mountains.  Of course, we can’t outrun what actually bothers me, what’s on my mind 24-7 it seems, but while driving, it seems like maybe I could.

There’s nowhere to go that can give me what I’m seeking.

Having a child with DBA is a strange state of stuckness – there are people who get out of the maze, but usually they can’t quite explain how, and so you’re left wandering it, rechecking paths you’ve checked 10 times before, looking for new ones, wondering if the risks of that path are worse the possibility you’d find an opening in the hedge, a way to escape, and to finally move forward.

It can be especially daunting when you know that many time, the new path  it just leads you into a new circular stuck lrpattern.

And yet people do get out.  Knowing that, how could I stop seeking an opening for us?

Adahlia just woke up.  

She doesn’t realize she’s in a maze.  It is the only thing she’s ever known.  

So let’s play in it, shall we?  We’ll find all the wonderful things we can… And I’ll keep my eye out for secret passages.

(I’ve heard of one I think I’m ready to try…)